Has it been a week already?

Not quite.  We're 48 hours shy, but it has been one heck of a week already!

Seeing all three of my babies at the breasfast counter that next morning almost brought me to tears.

The first two days were definitely a honeymoon period, when we were all so happy and relieved to see each other and be home that we had huge amounts of patience.  Lucky for us, we came home to some beautiful fall weather and were able to work and play outside.

Cleaning up the leaves in the yard.

Ready....  Set....  ACTION!

 

This was a very big step for Elliott.  He was deathly afraid of the dogs and the cat on the first day.  Even the sound of paws and claws on tile in the kitchen would send him into tears.  Charlotte, being the super-duper big sister and problem solver, put our cat in his shopping cart in hopes that they'd figure it out and get along.  As you can see here, it won Elliott over.  He is now a cat lover.

And we finally conquered bath time, too.  After all of the screaming and protesting over every single bath or shower in China, he jumped right in with his sisters in the tub on the very first night.  In fact, he cried when we had to pull him out after half an hour.  He was the last one to get out.  Go figure!

Elliott is 100% all BOY. 

If I set my girls down with a coloring book and a box of crayons, I can come back in two minutes and they will still be coloring.  In the lines.  Quietly.

If I set my son down at the table with the same coloring book and crayons, and came back in two minutes, he will have eaten the coloring book, colored the entire wall with the crayons, and would probably be standing on the table.  :o)

There is definitely going to be a learning curve to raising a boy. 

He loved the kitty-in-the-shopping-cart trick so much, he's been thinking up more creative ways to transport the cat around the house.

Elliott loves playing up in the treehouse.  There's a little kitchenette in it and it's fun to see him do a little role playing as a cook.  It's interesting to see how much he knows about it.  He obviously watched his foster mother prepare his meals. 

We took him to see a dentist and to see his pediatrician this week. So far his spina bifida has not been the major concern for us at all.  It's his teeth.  He is going to have to have 5 to 7 teeth surgically extracted at the hospital as soon as we can get him cleared medically to go under general anesthesia.  The timing of it is not ideal; we are still working on trust and attachment, but this cannot wait.  Two of his teeth have identifiable pulp and nerve tissue showing, and three of the rotted teeth are soft and black.  I have to assume that it's painful and miserable for him.  We have started him on antibiotics for the tooth infection and dental abscess as a result of his poor teeth, but it's just a temporary fix.  The teeth have to go.

What we know about Elliott so far:

He does not like to be dirty and can wash up pretty independantly.

He likes to wash his hands and brush his teeth and would do so 50 times a day if he could reach the sink.

He will pick up every single kernel of corn or Cheerio that fall in his bib pocket.

He loves to push buttons.  Of any kind.  Especially if they make a noise.

He wants to plug and unplug electronics.

He is a fire bug.  He loves to watch Baba and I start fires in the fireplace with a pretty intense stare.

He loves his orange shoes but doesn't care what pants or shirt he has on.

He isn't afraid of textures.  He will squish playdough for quite a long time.

He has a fear of animals that is going to take a while to overcome.  Even fish.

He absolutely LOVES busses and trucks.

His giggle and his cry sound a lot alike.  Sometimes I have to look at his face to determine which it is.

His favorite foods are corn, Cheerios, peanuts, and bananas.

He's an adrenaline junky, and loves to be tossed around.

He absolutely fits in our family!

Our major challenge, other than his medical issues, has been sleep.  He is still having night terrors where he wakes up screaming several times a night.  It makes sense, as nighttime is when our brains 'download' and 'file' all of the information and emotion from the day.  And his list is pretty long.  But it doesn't make it easy on him, or for Matt and I.  It's been three weeks since I've gotten more than 3 hours at a time, or more than 6 hours in a night.   He's really restless, even in between nightmares.  And his reaction to waking is always a desire to guzzle down water to soothe himself, which means we're also changing lots of diapers at night.  After weeks of this Matt and I are starting to wear pretty thin, and during the afternoons I feel like I'm walking around in a cloud.  I hope this gets better soon.  I am so thankful for our sweet friends who have dropped meals by.  I never expected to be this busy or this tired after coming home. 

We made the decision to do 'cocooning' or 'nesting' even before we went to China.  We have read several books and spoken to several professionals about securing emotional attachment with a child who has been through adoption, and all of them recommended a period after placement to stay at home and rebuild those important bonds or trust and affection before involving extended family and friends.  It makes sense to me.  These kids who have spent time in an institution (orphanage) learn to be charming and get what they want by seeking it from several different people.  Caregivers change when employees change and as the children get older.  They don't often develop that "you and me" relationship with anyone and it's hard to backup and redo that kind of mental processing.  It takes time and consistency, and its absolutely vital not only to his relationship within our family but enables him to have successful relationships throughout his life.  When we first got him, he would not make eye contact with us.  Once he got comfortable with us, he would not make eye contact with anyone else.  After about a week, he would smile at others if they smiled at him.  By the time we were coming home, he was waving and blowing kisses at complete strangers.  That was a big red flag, and it reinforced our decision to sort of lock ourselves here on the farm until Thanksgiving.  It has been hard.  I want so badly not only to let him meet all of his family and friends who have loved and prayed for him with us for so long, but more than that I want him to have that relationship be a healthy one.  So for all of you waiting patiently for us, thank you.

Off to bed.  Little panda bear has been watching me type and just fell asleep on my chest.  :o)